Foreword

Back in the summer of 2003, my friend Kelsey and I went on a 3 and a half week trip through Europe. Our visit was mainly concentrated in Switzerland, but included visits to Italy, France, and Germany. For most of the visit, up until the last few days, I kept a journal chronicling the events as they occurred. Kelsey had been asking me for quite some time after the trip had ended to make her a copy of the journal. I never got around to it, for various reasons: laziness, school resuming, work, etc. Then a few nights ago, I was at dinner with Kelsey and she mentioned an incident from the vacation. And it occurred to me that I could post the journal on an online blog, so that Kelsey, and all of my other friends as well, could enjoy them. And also any random strangers that happen to stumble by. Most of what I have written was in the midst of extreme jet lag and the sugar highs that resulted from the attempts to stay alert. Some of the content has been edited for a multitude of factors (but only when absolutely necessary): its boring, too personal, a little crass (I can cuss like a sailor), or to protect the innocent. But rest assured, all of it is 100% true, it really did happen, and all the writing is my own. So enjoy....

May 23, 2003 – Friday

Getting Started

First day of the trip! Kelsey got to my house at 945am. Her boyfriend Micah drove us to SFO airport. The flight was a direct through United, about 13 hours or more. The food wasn bad, the movies were kind of lame, and the plane smelled like dirty French armpit. You know, the usual.

May 24, 2003 – Saturday

Yannik

Arrived at the Charles de Gaulle airport at about 1030am. Yannik, this French friend of my dad’s that lived with us for a while my senior year of high school, picked us up and took us to the Gare de Lyon. The three of us didn’t really talk that much, because he remembered very little English, and for some reason, I always get really shy around him and can’t talk. It’s probably because of all the times he’s joked with my father about marrying me when I “come of age.”

Kelsey and I hopped on the TGV to Lausanne, Switzerland, which was about a 5 ½ hour ride. Met Heidi, a girl from Georgia, and her friend Crystal who were spending the summer backpacking, and talked with them through the ride while Kelsey slept. My dad and aunt Laurie picked us up at the station, and took us back to Laurie’s apartment. Most of the family was there, my mom, uncle Jacqui and his girlfriend Gilbert, and Grandma. Didn’t stay up to socialize because the jet lag left us exhausted, and we passed out.

May 25, 2003 – Sunday

Dinner with Jacques

Woke up around 5 in the morning, starved to death from missing dinner the night before. I was afraid of waking up my aunt, so I stayed in bed for over a half hour until my stomach won out, and I raided the leftovers. I fell back asleep, but eventually woke up in time to catch the 1:30pm train to Fribourg. Jacqui met us at the station and took us through his hometown of Avenches. We saw the ruins of a roman theatre that was being renovated for future concerts and events. We also toured through the chateau, which is visible from his balcony.

Later, the family met up at the apartment, and we went out to dinner at this local gourmet pizzeria that Jacqui adores. The food was amazing, and Jacqui and I followed it with grape ice cream drowned in grappa. Back at the apartment, we shared more wine and limoncella. We called it a night and headed back to Laurie’s because the next morning Kelsey and I were planning on heading to Cinque Terre, Italy with my parents.

May 26, 2003 – Monday

Kelsey cops a feel

Had to wake up around 4 am in order to shower and finish packing a travel bag for Italy. We met my parents at the Lausanne train station. Took the train to Brig, where we caught a Cisalpino train to Milano. We had no reservations for the train, which were apparently required, so we had to split up in order to find seats, which ended up costing us more money.

Kelsey and I ended up sitting across from this Australian woman, whose actual gender was much in question. S/he was very nice, but s/he had these very thickly penciled eyebrows that proved to be very distracting. Well, the whole transgender question proved a little distracting too.

When we got to Milano, we had to hop another train to Ventimiglia, then to Genova Piazza Principale, where we boarded another train that finally took us to Monterosso in Cinque Terre. Upon arrival, we met a guy who took us to a nice little 3 bedroom apartment where we would be staying for the next couple of nights.

Kelsey and I headed out to the balcony of my room, and noticed quite a nice view. There was this shirtless, muscular gardener at a house across the way, and we broke out Kelsey’s camcorder in order to preserve the memory. After that, we headed for dinner at Miky Ristorante, which was recommended to us. Unfortunately, the food took forever, and wasn’t very filling, so we were still hungry afterwards. But by that time it was so late that nothing was open.

May 27, 2003 – Tuesday

The Dancing Queen

After the usual morning activities, (shower, breakfast, Kelsey’s daily sappy lovesick phone call to Micah), we started on our way to explore the 5 towns of Cinque Terre. Cinque Terre is actually Italian for “five earths”, or something like that, and it was made up of 5 towns, named Monterosso al Mare, Vernazza, Corniglia, Mana Rola, and Rio Maggiore.

We hopped on the train to take us to the furthest town, Rio Maggiore. We walked through the town, which had these very cool murals and painted tunnels. We passed by this little shop/restaurant that had a hand-painted sign of Bart Simpson out in front. (Represent!) We bought this trail pass in order to walk through to the other towns. The trails there cost money to use in order to maintain them against the constant erosion.

The pass from Rio Maggiore to Manarola is known as the Via Dell’Amore, or the walk of love, which is supposed to be a romantic thing to share. Kelsey and I spent the time “ooh-ing” and gagging at my parents, and contemplating the platonic nature of the “friend-love”.

At the end of the pass, we met a funny Italian man working with his crew by the trail. He began to dance and sing us a mambo, culminating in him ripping off his shirt to expose his hairy chest and declaring his love for his “American friends”.

On the pass from Manarola to Corniglia, we saw this adorable stray orange cat napping on the side of the trail that let us come up and pet him and take pictures. As we continued walking, we caught up to this group of Italian children on a field trip. They were lined up to take roll, and they begged us for high fives as we passed. I declined, but Kelsey indulged, only to have the kids withdraw their hands at the last second, much as I had suspected. The walk was excruciatingly long, and contained many steep flights of stairs, but we finally made it to Corniglia.

We stopped at this little outdoor café, which was closed, but the people were really nice and made us some spaghetti al pomodoro. A very cute short haired Siberian husky named “Luna” came up to the table. I love those dogs. After eating, we saw some more of the sites, and actually ended up running into that girl Heidi, from Georgia, that I had me on the TGV. My dad loudly pointed out some cute guys to us, who we later discovered spoke English, so, thanks dad!

In the town, I made Kelsey try on this apron of a naked lady’s body on, and took pictures of it for Micah. We ran into the dog Luna again, outside a gelateria, making friendly with a male dog. (Note that I use “making friendly” as a euphemism for something else.)

The humidity was getting intense, and making the walk difficult, so we decided to take the train to Vernazza. I ended up having to buy a new shirt because the one I was wearing became drenched from sweat in the heat. We toured through the town and its shops, and hiked up to this high tower to get a view of the ocean.

We ended up taking a boat back to Monterosso, and stopped at a bar to have a drink. After that, did a little shopping and headed to dinner at Il Pirata. Kelsey and I had some fun staring at these cute boys sitting across from the restaurant. When we went for a walk after dinner, we saw them again, but they were acting like complete morons. Kind of regretting the previous attraction now.

Back up in the room, I couldn’t sleep no matter how hard I tried. And the days of sleep deprivation were really taking a toll, and it was making me kind of giddy. My dad invited us to come with him and my mom to Firenze later in the week, but I told him I wasn’t sure if we would be able to afford where he was planning to stay. He responds with some comment about how he’s not searching for a five-star experience, so he’d be happy with a cheaper place. For some reason, this comment just killed me and I erupted into giggles that I could not suppress for the remainder of the evening. It reminded me of that commercial for the John Ascuaga’s Nugget in Reno, and I kept singing that damn song over and over again.

At this point, I’m laughing so hard I’m almost unable to breathe. Kelsey is completely lost at this point, and on the verge of a breakdown similar to my own. She has never heard of John Ascuaga before, and she thinks I’m making it all up. I start teasing her that now I’ll have to take her to Reno to meet him. This then prompts me to tease her that she’s going to end up marrying the guy, and change her name to Kelsey Ascuaga.

My parents come barging out of their room at this point, yelling at us that we are psycho and making to much damn noise. We move it outside, and the conversation ends up taking even stranger turns.

We delved into deep conversations about dirty words and unfortunate noises. That night, a young sesame breadstick and two apricot cookies lost their innocence.

May 28, 2003 – Wednesday

Mom getting hit on by the locals

Got up around 8 am that morning, mere hours after we had finally went to bed, and headed to breakfast. My parents headed out to see one last sight, and I started in a Cuba Libre to help numb me before the next train ordeal. Very healthy breakfast.

While waiting for the train, we saw some very attractive shirtless men chilling on the beach just below us. Kelsey offered me a Euro if I would take a picture of them, which I did. She would have done it herself, but she was worried what Micah would say when he saw the pictures get developed.

Once we finally boarded the train, Kelsey and I found a little cabin all to ourselves, and started to talk about home and work. Kelsey told me about some racist restaurant customers that she had to deal with at our work, Pasta Pomodoro, one night when she was managing. Apparently, they refused to be served by a Mexican waiter. (I remarked that I too, then, would be unable to serve them, as I am Mexican by injection. Ha ha. Yeah, I'm disgusting.)

I now have that song, “The Girl from Ipanema”, stuck in my head. It’s all my dad’s fault. I’ve also noticed that Kelsey says “Zing” a lot, whenever I make a joke. I find this interesting. To pass the time, I listen to Kelsey’s CD of John Mayer Live. It gets me to wondering why it is that the audience is always very loud and annoying at the beginning and end of the song, but disappears entirely during the song. I notice this only on professional live albums. Any bootlegs that I have of concerts, you can hear the audience throughout. Hmm…

The train is stopped by the Italian Polizia/Customs on the Swiss border, and I am unable to find my passport. I emptied over half my bag looking for it, and I’m getting really panicked, when Kelsey suddenly remembers that it is in her bag. I don’t think the customs people like me right now. They shot me some really dirty looks. Must look like another stupid American tourist. Really wish I had my Swiss passport on me right now.

Kelsey started to write some postcards to the people back home. I stole one from her and wrote to Micah. I told him that because of our romantic trek through the Via dell’Amore, Kelsey and I had discovered our love for each other and were running away together. I wish I could see his face when he reads it.

May 29, 2003 – Thursday

My cousin Chris

Today, we were supposed to go to Estavayer with my parents and uncle. But since we never really took any time to get over the jet lag, they told us to stay home and recover.

That night, more of the family came over to dinner, including my cousin Chris, whom I have not seen in 5 years, with his girlfriend Stephanie. Chris had to leave early; he had work at 7:30. He is a bartender at the LoftElectroClub. He invited us to come visit him at the club and stay the night at his apartment, and we decided to take him up on his offer.

Laurie took us around Lausanne a little bit to show us the sights, and then took us to the club. She ended up going in with us, so she could talk to Chris and get us the key to his apartment to stash our stuff. A lot of the people and the bouncers outside teased her a little bit, since it was more of a younger atmosphere.

Chris set us up with free drinks the whole night, which was sweet, even though the selection was not what we were used to. (As in, the Swiss are wussy drinkers.) This older German guy with pretty good English came up to us and started hitting on Kelsey. He was kinda creepy, so we ignored him until he gave up and left.

A group of guys came up to our table and started talking to us. One of them was named Philippe, another Tim. Philippe was talking to Kelsey, saying that Tim thought I was cute, but spoke no English, and wanted to know if I was available. Which ended up being a total crock of shit, because I found out later that Tim spoke almost perfect English. It was a total line!

Tim convinced Kelsey and I to go into the discotheque with him, which was free for us because of my cousin. Tim kept telling me I was beautiful and that he liked me, and since I was a guest in his country, I was required to dance with him. Unfortunately, his idea of dancing was to grab my chest and crotch a lot. He kept trying to kiss me, and slobbered over my neck a bit, and was attempting to convince me to come home with him. It was funny up to a point, but I was getting a little tired of his persistence. Plus, Kelsey refused to dance since she thought it was unfair to Micah back home. Cute and disgustingly sappy at the same time.

We headed for Chris’ apartment, and ended up being followed by Tim and the boys, so we had to race a bit at the end to get into the apartment before they could catch us. When we got upstairs, Chris’ roommate was in the room where we were intending to sleep, so we sat up a bit and talked to him. It was well after 3 am when we finally passed out.

May 30, 2003 – Friday

Les grenouilles (The Frogs)

We eventually stumbled back to Laurie’s in the morning, and caught the 1pm train into Estavayer-le-Lac in order to visit the Frog Museum. I’d found out about it through this cool book I have called Weird Europe. The town was very medieval, with lots of old buildings and artifacts.

The museum had a lot of neat stuff besides the frogs, but they were definitely the piece de resistance. The frogs were dressed and positioned in very cute ways. My favorite was called “Le Cavalier”, and it was a little frog riding a squirrel like a horse. This exhibit was created a long time ago by some man who lived near a creek, and would collect the frogs, stuff them, and make little dioramas. It was so twisted.

On our way back into town, we wanted to stop at an ATM to get some money, but it was closed. Unlike ATMs back home which run 24 hours, these shut down at 4:30 pm. Very lame.

My cousin Natalie invited us over to her apartment for dinner. As we were on our way out the door, my dad called us to give some advice on the weather and travel plans for the next day. When I finally got off the phone, we were running terribly late so I ran to the elevator. I should have taken my time however, because I ended up slipping and dropping Laurie’s apartment key down the elevator shaft. We stopped on every floor to see if, by any chance, the key had landed somewhere safe. No such luck. It was totally gone. I left a note for Laurie telling her what happened, and headed over to Natalie’s place.

Dinner was great, got to catch up on a lot, and Natalie gave us her spare key to the apartment so we could get back in. Laurie wasn’t upset at all, but I still felt like an ass.

May 31, 2003 – Saturday

Montreaux

We were supposed to wake up early to go to Luzern, but kept hitting the snooze button. We finally got it together around 11 am and decided to go to Montreaux and the Chateau de Chillon. We arrived at around ten to 1, but instead of taking the second train to the Chateau, we decided to do the hour walk to Veytaux-Chillon.

It was so beautiful outside, and the city looked amazing. People were swimming, boating, and rollerblading. This last part made Kelsey and I really long for our skates. When we got to the Chateau, it was nice and cool in the Crypte, which was a great change after our walk.

We looked around forever to find an ATM, and when we finally located one, I realized I’d forgotten my wallet back at home, so Kelsey pulled some money out to lend me. We were pretty tired at this point, so we decided to head back to Lausanne. At the Lausanne station, we found out our shuttle to the Romanel train (where Laurie’s apartment was), was shut down because of the G8 Manifestations.

(In case you didn’t know, the G8 is a meeting of the 8 most powerful countries in the world, where they discuss how they plan to continue trying to run the world. Seems a little too much like a Pinky and the Brain episode in my opinion.) Anyway, I knew that they had planned to shut down a lot of boat and train service to Geneve because of the protestations, but I’m surprised they would shut down such a dinky little shuttle service.

So we were forced to walk pretty high uphill to the Romanel train, but we got home. We walked around a bit looking for a market, but they were all far away, and closed down. And it wasn’t even 7pm.

My dad called and told me it was a good thing we did not go to Luzern after all. Turns out, the weather over there was horrific.

June 1, 2003 – Sunday

View of Solithurn

Stayed up late the night before talking to Kelsey, so we had problems waking up. The awful sleep schedule I’m running on is causing me to have very creepy stalker dreams.

Decided to go to Solithurn for the day, and wanted to pick up sandwiches at the train station to take with us. The Swiss have a weird way of making sandwiches; they put a shitload of butter on it. It was so gross, and I kept wiping it off. By the time I was done wiping off the butter, there was practically no sandwich left.

Almost all the shops and stuff in Solithurn ended up being closed. Apparently, this is totally normal for Switzerland, which I guess I must have not noticed the last couple of times I’ve visited. I find it so annoying that everything is closed. I’m used to the convenience of always having something open. Besides, I don’t have many days on my vacation and I want to maximize them. My mom said it was because the country was “quaint”, but since when did “quaint” have to be so butt-fuck middle of nowhere at times? Here is the list: ATMs are only open until 4:30pm, stores are closed on Sundays and Mondays, and on every other day, stores close between 5 and 6 pm. When I get home, I want to salute a 7-Eleven. Switzerland is not very insomniac friendly.

Decided to cancel upcoming trip to Venezia. The weather in Italy was storming like crazy. Don’t know if or when we’ll make it out there.

June 2, 2003 – Monday

Train Views

Woke up to Kelsey making the strangest noises. You know, like in South Park, when the guy makes the sound of the dying giraffe? Kind of like that, but with a little more gurgle to it.

Headed out to Bern, saw all the sites, including the Child Eater Fountain, which is as weird as the name implies. The Parliament building was especially beautiful. As we continued walking along the road, we came across a Starbucks. This moment totally made Kelsey’s vacation. She had been undergoing serious withdrawal from her lack of iced white mochas.

Headed over to the BarenGraben (or Bear Pits). There were 4 bears total, at least as far as we could see. They were so cute, but the smell wasn’t so adorable. We did some shopping, ate a quick bite, and headed back home to get to the market in time before it closed.

That night, we were invited to have dinner at my Grandma’s house. Kelsey was feeling a bit homesick, so she decided to stay at Laurie’s place in order to call Micah and her family and try to find something on the TV in English.

When I got to dinner, I remembered about this incident that had happened the other day on the train ride back from Solithurn. I had forgotten all about it. Kels and I were heading back, when the train seemed to go over this huge bump and start immediately slowing down. Someone came over the intercom after the train stopped, and it was very garbled, but I caught them saying something along the lines of “accident of person”, or something like that. At first, I thought that meant that someone on the train had an accident, although that didn’t make so much sense. I told everyone at dinner about it, because I wanted to know if they had heard of it, or knew what had happened. The general consensus was that it was probably somebody that laid down on the tracks to commit suicide. Apparently, this happens quite often around here. Laurie says Switzerland has the second highest suicide rate in the world. I’m a little disturbed now.

When I got back to Laurie’s, Kelsey was still feeling kind of down, so I decided to act like a total fool to try to help cheer her up. I started talking in really strange voices, telling her stories about evil puppets that would come to her in her sleep and eat her. She brightened up at this, so I spent the rest of the evening describing the puppets and their evil nightly deeds until we laughed ourselves to sleep.

June 3, 2003 – Tuesday

Chateau Morges

Got up early to pack and headed for Morges because we were going to go to Firenze with my parents. We were running pretty late, so we had to take a taxi from the Morges station to my grandma’s house. The taxi driver was totally sweet, and shut off her meter early, so I left her a fat tip.

My dad was just returning from the hospital as we arrived. (Earlier last month, he had herniated a disk, and his back, neck, and shoulder were still hurting.) He had been given a couple of morphine shots, so he was feeling a little better. On the way home, he had found out that several of the trains would not be running because it was the last day of the G8 conferences and they were expecting trouble.

It was decided that we would leave tomorrow instead. Since we were going to take the 6am train, my parents thought it would be best if Kelsey and I stayed the night in Morges, so we did not have to run around like crazy again.

We ended up walking through Morges to see the chateau and vineyards in the area. We were hoping to see the museum in the chateau, but it was closing just as we arrived. We passed by some soldiers on the walk, and my dad got Kelsey and I to pose with them for pictures. The weather started getting pretty hot, and we had already walked abut 6 miles already, mostly uphill, so we were heading back. (I’m still shocked my dad could handle that walk. Morphine is a wonder.)

When we got back to my grandma’s, Kelsey saw this see-saw, and was dying to try it out. Unfortunately, it was more butt-bruising then exciting, and I think I was walking a little bowlegged back to the apartment.

The pull-out sofa wasn’t very comfortable, and my grandmother had all her lights on, so it was difficult to fall asleep. On top of this, Kelsey had developed a nasty sunburn that afternoon, and was wincing and hurting every time she rolled over. Just as we were finally starting to fall asleep, my grandmother’s cats started making these really weird meowing/caterwauling noises, like they were in heat. After a while though, they shut up, and we finally passed out.

June 4, 2003 – Wednesday

Wicked Eyes

My dad woke us up early in the morning to make the train, and I had the hardest time getting out of bed because of the awful nights sleep. I finally dragged my ass out of bed to get dressed and stumbled over to my clothes.

This is where the story starts to get interesting.

When I picked up my clothes, they were not where I had left them on the couch, but on the floor. I figured they had just slipped down in the night, but when I reached down to grab my bra, I noticed it was wet. I leaned in to smell it, and discovered it was soaked in cat piss.

I was so shocked that it took me a second to realize that it was the only bra I had packed for the short trip, and that there would be no way to get it cleaned and dried in time to leave, or to go grab another one from Laurie’s.

I started to pull on my jeans next, only to discover that those, too, had puddles of pee on them. And they were also the only pair of pants I had packed for the trip. Previously, I thought I was so smart and cool for managing to pack so light, and now I was totally regretting it.

Since I did not have any extra clothes, I had to borrow a pair of pants from my mom, which were about 3 sizes to big for me. As for a bra, I had to wear a tight zip-up sweater to hold back my breasts, because my mom’s bras are enormous, and Kelsey’s much too small. I kept joking that it was like a really skewed version of a Goldilocks story, only all the items that were “just right” were covered in the contents of a feline’s bladder.

I felt so shy in the train because too much movement made my chest jiggle like mad and the pants made me look really fat. And to make matters worse, we didn’t have a reservation for the train, so we ended up getting kicked out of our seats, and I had to parade about the train in my wonderful little ensemble.

We walked around looking for a place to sit, but the only place that still had seats remaining wasthe smoking section, and the smell made Kelsey and I sick. So we tried the dining car, but I thought it smelled like a mixture of cold cuts and barf, and made me even more nauseous than the cigarette smoke. I spent the rest of the train ride standing with Kelsey by an exit door trying not to vomit.

We finally arrived in Firenze (Florence),and found a little pensione to stay in. Once we got settled, I stripped off the evil clown pants and flopped on the bed, passing out almost immediately.

Kelsey is the greatest friend in the world! Being the total sweetheart that she is, she went out while I was sleeping to do some shopping and find me a new pair of pants and a bra. After a couple of tries, we found an awesome pair of jeans that I am totally in love with. No such luck with the bra though. It appears that most women in Italy are flat-chested, and not very many of the bras went up to my size. Which is surprising, because I’m only a 36C, which is the average back home. The only one that fit was one of those ugly 50s style bras of hideous lace that makes your boobs all pointy and cone-like. But I figured that beggars can’t be choosers, and in spite of a washing, the other one still smelled just a little strange.

Fresh and happy in my new clothes, I went out with Kels into the square to do some shopping. I stopped at this store where Kelsey had bought my jeans and thought I’d look to see what else they had. The woman there was a little crazy and kind of insistent, and kept bringing over clothes for me to try, telling me “Oh, You like this color. You try this, yes?” And everything she brought over was beige/tan. What does that say for me when someone looks at me and thinks, “That girl just screams Beige!”?

Around this time, I had started to notice another side effect to the ugly bra. It itched so bad I was scratching like a maniac. I quickly came to the conclusion that a slightly smelly bra was preferable to breaking out in hives all over my nipples, so I headed back to the room to change. On the way, we ran into this guy that had apparently been flirting with Kelsey while she was out on her solitary shopping mission for me. (I had warned her previously that Italian men adore blondes, but she never quite believed me.)

The guy had been really persistent with her, and she had only managed to get away by insisting she had to meet a friend. While she had been gone, he found a friend, so that when Kelsey and I walked by, he told her he brought someone to keep me company so they could go out dancing. I found this whole thing terribly amusing, especially considering that the friend he had brought for me was way more attractive than the guy himself. I ended up teasing her about it for the rest of the night. Let me get back at her for her laughter over my urine-drenching.

As we were trying to decide where to eat, Kelsey was getting all kinds of attention. All sorts of men were staring at her and calling to her and flirting with her. She is so adorably oblivious to it as well. She didn’t believe me that they were into her, and thought they must have been flirting with me. I kept trying to explain that they love the blonde American girls in Italy, and I was too European looking for them.

As if to prove my point, when we were out walking later that night, an Italian girl came up to me asking for directions, assuming I was a local. As I stared at her like an idiot, (the only Italian I know is menu items), she looked really surprised and said “You’re not Italian?” My dad laughed and told me that it was the dark hair that was fooling them. (So apparently unnatural purple-red hair looks Italian.) Plus he says that Italian women are pretty shrewish, and that I seem like that kind of girl. Dads give the best compliments.

June 5, 2003 – Thursday

The beginnings of the wicked sunburn

Woke up feeling like shit and didn’t want to get out of bed. Kelsey’s sunburn had gotten progressively worse, so she had turned up the air conditioning all the way the night before. Even though I had stolen all her blankets to add to my own, I still froze and woke up shivering. My nose was really stuffed up and my throat sore. Kelsey was doing just as poorly; the sunburn was actually pretty serious.

We eventually got up and went out in order to see more of the city. In the really rich section of the city where they sell all the gold and jewelry, I ran into Heidi and her friend Crystal again, the girls from the TGV train. It’s pretty amazing that we would accidentally run into each other twice like that.

I ended up convincing Kelsey to buy Micah a pair of boxer shorts from a street vendor that had a picture of the genitalia from Michelangelo’s David on it. It took a lot of convincing. After that, we headed to the museum to see the actual statue of David, which, as I flagrantly pointed out to Kelsey, is uncircumcised.

After a nap and some more shopping, we went to a restaurant for dinner called Buca Niccolino’s. The waiter was adorable, really shy and quiet, very little English, and every other word out of his mouth was “Okay!”. At the end of the meal, he brought us complimentary drinks, which was so sweet.

While we were eating, a man came by selling lighters. The man was deaf, and apparently this is kind of sales is really common with handicapped people in Europe. My dad was telling me that there is this organization that provides them with cards to pass out with prices listed, and they set samples in front of you to choose from. Kelsey and I ended up buying these really cute lighters for our friends that looked like rifles. And the guy was so cute, and he mimicked shooting a gun when we picked out the rifles.

We went out for some gelato afterwards. The sugar content of that stuff is insane. Kels felt really full afterwards, and wanted to go for a walk before bed. My dad went with us, because he wanted to stop by the train station to get a look at the schedules for the next day. My dad was way out in front of us, when Kelsey and I passed by this group of men.

As they passed by Kelsey, one of them reached over and tried to grab her. I was behind her as this happened, and was reaching out to smack his hand away, but luckily she stepped out of the way quickly. I stopped in front of the guy and stared at him with my mom’s “death look”. My brother calls it the “Ball-withering Stare.” The guy got really nervous and turned away quickly to break eye contact. He was gone when we got back. I guess I really do have the “shrewish Italian woman” thing going for me. Great.

My dad went over the train schedules with us, and I noticed this shy American girl standing off to the side, staring at us like she wanted help but was too intimidated to ask. As my dad started to leave, she shot me this really pleading look and I told my dad that I think she wanted to ask him a question. She looked relieved and thanked me, and asked my dad to help explain the schedules to her and tell her what trains she needed to take. After that, we headed back to the room and packed for the next morning.

June 6, 2003 – Friday

Building in Firenze

In the morning, my mom wanted to do a little shopping before we headed out and she asked me to go with her. She saw these towels she wanted, and needed me to help her negotiate the price down from €8.50 each to €5 each. The guy really wasn’t very bright, which I think made him harder to negotiate with. I went up and offered him €60 for a set of 12 towels, and he was about to take it, but then he grabbed a calculator and added up. He then told me that the towels cost €7.50 each, so the 12 towels would cost €102.50. This started me laughing, and I told the guy that was impossible, because 7.5 multiplied by 12 was 90, and so he was trying to charge me €8.50. He just stared at me for a bit and then pounded furiously at his calculator for a bit. I think he was pissed off that I could do the sums in my head, to be honest. I told my mom she should forget about it, because the towels actually looked quite cheap and very poor quality, and she might as well go to Cost Plus when she got home.

We arrived in Pisa after a short train ride, only to learn that the next train out would be coming in 10 minutes, and the next one after that would not be for several hours, which would force us to arrive back in Switzerland well past midnight. So, we did not get to see Pisa, sadly.

Kelsey insisted on buying us lunch, which was Italian McDonald’s, the only place in the train station. My mom was excited because she had seen this ad walking through Firenze for the “Greek Mac”, which was basically a Big Mac wrapped up in a pita pocket. But for some weird reason, she got a killer craving for it. She wasn’t all that impressed however.

On the train ride home, my parents insisted on treating us to dinner in the first class dining car. My dad said that when he first brought my mother overseas to meet his family, they ate together on the train. So they thought it was a really special experience that they wanted us to have. Sure enough, it was pretty fun.

June 7, 2003 – Saturday

Kelsey and I had to get up early to pack and get ready for our little mini-trip to Munchen (Munich). Earlier in the vacation, my parents had decided that because of my dad’s injury, it was better not to go, and so they offered us their hotel room free of charge, since they had already paid for it. We were going to visit my cousin Julie, who was there studying, wanting to train to be an interpreter.

Laurie drove. We took a rest-stop in Gruyere. There were these neat cow statues all painted with different themes and pictures. It reminded me of back home when they made all those shark statues to put up around San Jose for a while. I treated us all to breakfast while we were there.

When we reached the Swiss-Austrian border, I had my second run-in with disgruntled border patrol. This time I had left my passport in my backpack, which was locked in the trunk. I’m making enemies everywhere.

We stopped in this city called Hard, Austria. Kelsey and I ran in to a mini-mart in order to stock up on car munchies when we finally discovered these chocolate eggs that my aunt had been telling us about for a while. They are called Kinder Eggs, and they are milk chocolate on the outside, white chocolate on the inside, and are much too rich for my taste. But inside is this plastic egg that opens up to reveal a cool toy you can assemble and play with. Kelsey and I bought a few and completely fell in love with them.

We eventually packed it back in, and our next stop was Mimmelwald in Germany. This town was so quiet, I could have sworn that all of the inhabitants had lapsed into a coma. It got me thinking that this was probably the inspiration for the Grimm fairy tales where the whole city is put to sleep when the princess is cursed.

After all the stops, we ended up arriving in Munich much later than Julie had expected. We were staying in the apartment complex where she lived, which also functions as a hotel, called Hotel Tessin. Julie was not there. She had gotten a little ancy waiting for us, so she went for a bike ride. Eventually, we got a hold of her, and I was really happy to see her. It felt like ages. She looked the best I had ever seen her, really healthy.

We hopped on the U-Bahn to head out and do some shopping and sightseeing. No luck with the shopping, so we concentrated on the sightseeing instead. We saw the big Glockenspiel, this huge marionette clock, but missed the little hourly show. It was still cool though, even though it was motionless. We then walked through the English Gardens, which were so pretty and peaceful.

Julie told us about these people that surf the river, and we wanted to check it out. It was underneath a bridge. There is this one spot where the current is ridiculously strong over the rocks, so it makes a permanent wave. People hop on surfboards and ride it back nd forth for as long as they can. The good ones do tricks. No one was very good that day, which is understandable because it looks very difficult.

Hit up the Biergarten, to split some liters and pretzels. After that we headed out for dinner, where our waitress had to be the grumpiest woman in the world, and called it a night.

June 8, 2003 – Sunday

Started out the day at Kunigsplatz, where there was this awesome modern art museum, housed in one of the biggest buildings I’ve ever seen. Some of these exhibits were monstrously large. There was all kinds of stuff, but the highlight for me was Matisse and Picasso.

After that, we headed for the Olympic Stadium. Also huge. As we passed by the auditorium, we heard something going on inside, and thought it might be a concert. Curious, we asked a guard what was going on, and found out that there was a men’s volleyball game, Germany v. Italy. It only cost €2, which they said was the only opportunity to get into the stadium that cheap, so we went for it.

The teams didn’t play very well. Anytime they missed a shot, they would get all melodramatic and fall to the floor in despair, beating their fists on the ground. And anytime someone’s body touched the ground, these kids with mops in weird outfits would have to come by and wipe the area. Those cleaning kids were the only ones on the floor with any hustle.

We went back to see the surfers; Kelsey had brought her video camera this time. It was the perfect day, because even though there were ugly clouds out, and it was starting to drizzle, there were some really talented people out. And one of them was really attractive, and his pants kept teasing to fall down in back. Thank god for video footage.

We headed back to the hotel, and Julie and Laurie went to go lie down. Kels and I were kinda hungry, and just needed to get out, so we went secretly for some food. When we got back, we discovered that Julie had made dinner for us. Kelsey was totally full, and horrified about eating again, but did not want to tell them we had eaten without them. So as full as I was, I ate all my food, and snuck some of hers so we wouldn’t seem like we were insulting the food. I thought my stomach would explode.

Once we had finished washing the dishes, we all hopped on the tram rode over to the Parliament building, which was lit up for the evening and looked completely gorgeous. As I stood up there, I realized that I could live in a place like Munich. It was unbelievable. I guess from all those World War II movies I’d seen, and what I’d heard from others, I expected Germany to be dirty, ugly, and run-down. Now I know that its one of the most incredible places I’ve ever seen.

June 9, 2003 – Monday

Checked out of the hotel. The room cost €140, thank god I did not have to pay for it. We were very close to the castle Nymphenburg, and so we went and toured the inside and the grounds.

When we got back to the car, we must have parked on an anthill, because we were instantly swarmed with ants. I swear, German ants must live off a diet of speed and steroids because they are the biggest, fastest damn ants I’ve ever seen.

Laurie and Julie wanted to go to McDonald’s for lunch. Kelsey and I went along as we had no choice, but exchanged looks of pain. No matter what they say about healthier standards, McDonald’s overseas is just as gross as McDonald’s back home.

After lunch, we went to Dachau to see the concentration camp. It was very interesting to go to the museum and learn the history, but it was emotionally intense. The less said the better.

I slept throughout the ride home. When we arrived back at the apartment, Kelsey and I rushed to get online in order to see if our grades for spring semester had been posted yet. I was really nervous, because I had majorly slacked on attendance, and I was sure my English professor hated me. When I pulled up the page and saw I had gotten all A’s, my heart was fluttering, I was so excited. It was my first semester back after taking a year off, so it was important that I did well.

June 10, 2003 – Tuesday

Chateau Morges

Went to Morges to meet my parents for a shopping expedition. When we arrived at my grandmother’s apartment, my parents surprised me with some novelty T-shirts they had bought me a few days before that were really adorable, and told me that they were dying to show me the store because I would really like it.

The shopping in town wasn’t too great, so after a bit, we all headed into Lausanne to wander through the shops there. Earlier in our travels, Kelsey and I had seen a window display for this really neat looking shop, which my dad helped us find. Got some good souvenirs and gifts for my friends there.
We went back into Morges for dinner that night, and my grandmother gave me a belated 20th birthday present, an 18-carat gold necklace with a matching heart charm. She explained that in Switzerland, it is a person’s 20th, not 21st, birthday that was most significant, and that she had given similar gifts to Julie and Natalie for their birthday

June 11, 2003 – Wednesday

Ice Tunnels


Today we got up very early to go to JungFrauJoch, which is apparently the highest point to travel in Europe. (I don’t think its actually the highest point, just the highest inhabitable point that still provides phone service.)

We got really confused on one of the trains and ended up getting off at the wrong stop. We were supposed to go to Interlaken Ost, but went to Interlaken West, the stop just before it. We bought tickets for the JungFrauBahn from this really rude guy who ended up overcharging us both by about 15 CHF each. In all the confusion, we missed our train, and were delayed another hour.

We eventually made it to the top of the mountain, by about 1pm. We visited the Ice Palace, which basically consists of ice sculpture, and was very cool. (Literally as well.) When we walked out onto the plateau, we sunk down into the ice a few times and had to pull each other out. But we got (what we hope are) some amazing pictures.

It was our last night in Switzerland, and ended with a dinner at my grandmother’s apartment, where we all exchanged emails and numbers and promised to write.

June 12, 2003 – Thursday

Jean Paul, Coco, Tin Tin

Our train into Paris was delayed until 1:15pm, but we got distracted and missed the Romanel train, and almost missed the Paris train entirely. We managed to get there just in time.

I had a very emotional goodbye with my grandmother. It is hard because I do not see her as often as I would like. Its been about every two years lately, which is not often enough, but I guess you don’t have much choice when the distance between is so large.

After the train left the station, a conductor came through to check the tickets. He said “Ca va?”, to which Kelsey replied “Ca va, et toi?”. My father, the conductor, and I all started laughing, because this was the incorrect form. Kelsey had addressed him in the familiar and not the formal, which assumes a sort of connection to the person. The conductor was hilarious, exclaiming that she was the perfect woman, since he could win her love without a single date, and he was going to steal her from the train and run away with her down the Champs Elysees. We translated this for Kelsey, who was completely embarrassed, and wouldn’t look at the guy for the rest of the ride.

Yannik was supposed to meet us at the train station in Paris, but when we arrived, he was nowhere to be found. We called him and found out that he was stuck at work and could not get away. He was going to be stuck there the next day as well. So, we would have to take the train to Reims to visit our friends. When we arrived in Reims, Jean-Paul was there waiting for us.

He grabbed our bags and took us over to what had to be the fanciest car I’d ever seen (a very high-class, custom-built Mercedes). Apparently, it cost over €600,000. It was completely keyless: it opened, closed, and started up all by the digital imprint of the owner’s hand. The man who owned it had lent it to Jean-Paul in order to pick us up. There was a TV inside the front of the car and on the back of each of the seats. Unfortunately, it was playing a DVD of a Johnny Hallyday concert, which wasn’t so much my taste.

We got to the Bar, and Valentin and Coco were there, as was Mr. Martinelli, the man who owned the expensive car. Several other people were also there, as this place is the center of activity in the town.

My mom started drinking, and actually ended up quite drunk and very giddy. She and Mr. Martinelli hit it off amazingly, he really liked her foul sense of humor. He liked my mom so much that he invited all of us out to this 5-star restaurant for the next day, to have lunch, his treat.

We went back to Marie-Jean’s house (Coco’s mother), where we would be staying the next few days. Kelsey and I had to share a very small bed, and during the night, I kept accidentally rolling over onto her and waking us both up

June 13, 2003 – Friday

The Bar Gang

Today we got up to go to the fancy lunch with Mr. Martinelli. The restaurant was called La Garenne, which means “The Wild Rabbit.” My mom, Coco, Kelsey, and myself all rode with Mr. Martinelli in his Mercedes. He insisted that my mother ride up front next to him. I swear she’s gonna have a sugar-daddy by the end of the trip.

My dad and Jean-Paul followed behind us in Jean-Paul’s truck. He showed us all the damage it had sustained from a bad hailstorm earlier in the week, on Tuesday. The hail had been huge, and left numerous dents the size of golfballs, even in the reinforced areas of the body. Apparently, hail that large can kill a person if it hits them on the head.

The worst part about this storm is the affect it was going to have on the champagne production that year. Many of the vineyards in Reims were destroyed by the hail, and the city is the largest producer of champagne. So this could potentially hurt their economy.

Lunch ended up being very tasty, and outrageously expensive. There was so much food, and even more alcohol. We started out with this “amuse-bouche”, which was this soupy melon thing mixed with pepper, and a glass of rose champagne. Next was an artichoke salad with apples and some kind of meat covered in a raspberry vinaigrette, served with a very light white wine.

My main course was a beef filet with pesto, peppers, and vegetables, paired with a rich red wine. They brought out the cheese course after this, and Mr. Martinelli insisted that I try another glass of wine, a very special one that was very dark and full. The wine itself was heavy enough to feel like a meal.

When everyone had finished, he ordered a bottle of champagne to “hold everyone over” until dessert. At this point, I was starting to get pretty tipsy. Dessert was a chocolate soufflé with vanilla bean ice cream drowned in chocolate and caramel sauce, which was paired with a special dessert wine.

The waitress brought over coffee after this, along with a special treat, courtesy of the chef. (Mr. Martinelli is their best customer, and one of the richest and most influential people in the region, according to Jean-Paul.) It was a plate of caramel-almond cakes, and dough cups filled with raspberries and cream, along with a little after-dinner drink.

I’m sure at this point my coherence was suffering, but I was having a great time. I kept staring at Coco’s hair, and I mentioned to her that I loved the cut, and always wished I was brave enough to do something like that with my hair. It was very cute, short pixie cut.

She told me it was her cousin that did the cut, and offered to make me an appointment. I was nervous about it, because I had never cut my hair so short before, and I did not want to look like a boy. But the alcohol made me a little braver, so I told her to go ahead and make the appointment.

Mom and Coco left then, taking the truck back to the Bar in order to open it back up to start making the pizzas. Usually, they only make the pizza once a week on Saturday nights, but since everyone was going to be out of town the next night for a wedding, they changed it to Friday instead.

The rest of us piled back into the Mercedes to head to this champagne and wine store that Jean-Paul is co-owner of, along with Coco’s uncle Michel. When we got there, they had a tasting for us, pulling out various bottles of expensive champagne and making us try them. Jean-Paul gave Kelsey a gift to take back home with her, a box with bottles of champagne from his uncle’s vineyard to share with her parents.

At this point, we decided to drive back to the bar. Mr. Martinelli was as drunk as I was, so he had Jean-Paul drive the Mercedes. But I guess maybe he was still driving a little funnily because we get pulled over by the police. And although Jean-Paul wasn’t drunk, he had forgotten his license back at the Bar, which is kinda bad.

It turned out to not be a problem. The cop comes up to the car, and when he leans over to look in, his demeanor instantly changes, because he notices Mr. Martinelli. This guy is so important, the cops probably wouldn’t have busted us for anything. My dad says the French are really strict about driving, and not having your license on you can face a pretty nasty penalty, so we ended up being lucky. The cop even provided himself as a police escort back to the Bar. I can’t believe I’ve actually had a police escort!

When we got back to the Bar, I passed out, being a little light-headed from the alcohol and everything. I woke up just in time for the pizza though. They have a little place in the back where they serve, and all the pizza is made in a wood-burning oven, and tastes incredible!

At the dinner, I was able to meet Michel, Coco’s uncle, who co-owns the store. His oldest daughter was with him, named Karen. When I first saw her, I thought she was gorgeous. When he introduces me, she tells me that she is the one who will be cutting my hair tomorrow, so I’m really looking forward to it now.

They served us more champagne and wine with dinner, and I think I hit my limit. Kelsey had to help me into bed that night, and I just completely passed out.

June 14, 2003 – Saturday

Firemen To The Rescue

Difficulty in getting up this morning, if that wasn’t gonna be obvious from the events last night. I had leftover pizza for breakfast. Just like home! I’m feeling a little nervous now about the haircut. Sobriety is starting to give me second thoughts, and I’m so scared I’m gonna look like a butchy little boy.

They had a huge lunch prepared at the Bar for today, in order to feed everyone before the wedding. They brought out tables to the sidewalk outside. As we were sitting and waiting, my mom noticed smoke coming through the windows of the house across the street. When she peered closer, she realized the house was actually on fire!

My dad and Jean-Paul immediately ran across the street to help. It was only a little elderly couple that lived there, and they were inside, having not yet noticed the fire. Turns out that they had been making French fries in a pot of oil over the fireplace. They took the fries into the kitchen to eat, but had forgotten the oil over the fire. It got too hot and caught fire, and since the chimney had not been cleaned in a while, it spread pretty quickly.

Together, Jean-Paul and my dad were able to put out the fire, but they both got some minor burns in the process. Plus, their throats were really hurting from inhaling the smoke. Although we were totally proud of them, my mom was a little upset at my dad because he took a big risk doing that in spite of his injuries.

When the fire department arrived, they declared that everything was okay, but only because Jean-Paul and my dad had saved the day. Everyone was treating them like heros, and it was cute. They were doing the same for my mom, because she was the one that noticed the fire in the first place.

Yannik finally arrived from Paris, bringing with him an enormous entourage. He told me that he would be driving me to my hair appointment. I guess last night, my mom had decided she wanted to get her hair cut too, so they made her an appointment as well. I felt better that I was not going to be doing it alone, except she wasn’t going to be cutting hers as short.

Yannik wanted to impress us, so he borrowed his friend’s Ferrari to take us to the salon. Kelsey came with me for moral support. Yannik couldn’t handle all the estrogen, so he took off, saying he’d be back by 5pm.

I really like my hair. I can’t believe I cut it though. It’s so different, but its so fun and easy, and it makes me look really different. It’s the happiest I’ve been with my hair in a long time. My mom didn’t feel the same way about hers though. She said it made her look like Julie Andrews in Sound of Music. I was amazed she liked my hair though, since normally she hates it when I cut my hair to even chin length, because she wants me to have long hair.

Since everyone else was at the wedding, Yannik and his biker friends held a BBQ at the Bar. Valentin stayed behind and played darts and foosball with Kelsey and I all night. At one point, Michel’s son Jules, who is 15, came and joined us. We had met him earlier at the wine store. That boy is such a flirt. He’s a little ladies’ man. Valentin was getting really jealous, and it was completely adorable. Every time Jules and I started talking, he would climb up on my lap and try to start me on a different conversation, or drag me over to the dart board away from Jules.

June 15, 2003 – Sunday

Little Valentin

Today was a pretty uneventful day. Everything around town was closed, since it was a Sunday and everything. Kelsey sat inside reading and going through her stuff, while I went outside to goof off with Valentin.

He tried to get me to try out his skateboard, and I kept falling off and landing on my ass. We ended up getting into a huge water-gun fight later, and we both were drenched from head to toe. Marie-Jean refused to let us back into the house until we stopped dripping. While we were waiting, he had me try to skateboard again. It doesn't get any easier when the ground is wet and your clothes are sagging from the water weight.

Once we had gotten back inside and changed into dry clothing, we spent the rest of the day in front of the TV playing video games. Eventually, the “grown-ups” came in and kicked us off the TV. There was supposed to be some big TV special for Johnny Hallyday’s birthday or something, and so there was going to be a several hours long concert. I decided to pass on that.

Valentin had to go home early to go to bed, because his school started up again the next day. He was so pissed because he wanted to stay and socialize, especially since tomorrow was going to be our last full day before we left to return home. He told his parents he wanted my dad to borrow the car tomorrow to pick him up for school, and refused to leave until we all promised to be there tomorrow to pick him up.

June 16, 2003 – Monday

Michel the Vintner

Our last full day. We spent the morning and early afternoon playing the tourist part in Reims, waiting for Valentin to finish out his school day. We saw some Roman aqueducts, and went to the cathedral where Jeanne d’Arc crowned the King. When Valentin was out, we headed over to pick him up.

Michel had invited us over to tour his vineyards and distillery. It was awesome, the place was beautiful. He then brought us to his house for some tastings of certain champagnes he had produced. He gave me a really awesome present of one of their rarest champagnes, that apparently, champagne collectorsover the world call him about daily, desperate to get a hold of the bottle. It was a limited production that was made especially in memory of his mother-in-law, for a special anniversary. He won’t sell them, only presents them as gifts. I was so honored when he gave me one.

That night, some of our friends threw a little going away dinner for us, as one last chance for all of us to sit down together before we left. It was a really awesome night.

June 17, 2003 – Tuesday

So Sad To Go

After we said our goodbyes to everyone in Jonchery, we made our way to the Charles de Gaulle airport. When we arrived at our gate, a large group of unwashed, nasty looking men were staring at Kelsey and I and making slurping noises in our direction. We chose to ignore it, and just absorbed ourselves in magazines.

My mom joked that with our luck, we would end up sitting near the sleazy guys. Sure enough, she cursed us, and we were caught in the middle of them. We actually got split apart, so that Kelsey was in one row, and I just behind. And we were both sitting next to some of the more unpleasant members of the group. We convinced them with some pains to switch with us so we could sit together.

A nicer member of the group socialized with us for the plane ride. He informed us that they were with the band Mudvayne, who were on tour. He band was up in first class while the roadies got to sit with us in coach. As we wandered through the plane, we come to learn that the man making the slurping noises earlier was actually the lead singer of the band. He apologizes to Kelsey, saying that he just thought I was really cute, and he hoped he hadn’t offended me. He then proceeded to tell me that he had a girlfriend, but that he had always dreamed of joining the mile-high club. I ignored this comment, and wondered to myself why he couldn’t dream of bathing.

The boys of this band were not very bright, and were in the back “sneaking” alcohol from the attendant’s trays. We tried to inform them that everything was gratis on international flights, so they were not actually stealing, but they did not seem to catch on.

We finally made it home, and my brother came and picked me and my parents up, and Micah came for Kelsey.

Thus ends the European adventure.

As Overheard: Quotable Moments in the Travels

Kelsey: “I really like your Grandma, but I’m afraid of her cats.”
(In reference to the clothing/cat piss incident.)

Marissa: “I’ll tell you what, you can laugh once a cat pees on you too.”
(In response to Kelsey teasing me about the cat piss incident.)

Marissa: “Ah, smell that dairy air (derriere).”
(Said when walking by a cow pasture in Morges.)

Kelsey: “We’re going to Interlaken West, right?”
Marissa: “No, Interlaken Ost.”
Kelsey: “But we’re in Interlaken Ost.”
Marissa: “No, we’re in Lauterbrunnen. See the sign?”
Kelsey: “Oh…”
(This is why we kept getting lost.)

Marissa: “NO! Wait! That’s not our train! Don’t get on it!”
(It was the right train.)

Kelsey: “I’m about to go someplace really depressing and I can’t stop laughing.”
(On the way to Dachau. I kept making jokes in the car.)

Marissa: “Okay. I just thought of something. This whole trip, you’ve been coloring in coloring books and begging me to go on every playground and swing-set you see. Yet you almost didn’t read that book because you thought it was too childish?”
(In reference to a book Kelsey had read on the trip.)

Tim: “I don’t like Americans.”
Marissa: “Well I don’t like imbeciles so we’re even.”
(Talking with the guy from the club.)

Marissa: “Who the hell puts butter on sandwiches? That’s wrong.”
(In reference to the train food.)

Kelsey: “Good night bedtime buddy.”
(Kelsey said this every night.)

Kelsey: “You can put that in.”
(Make up your own context for this one. Ha ha.)

Marissa: “You are gonna marry Micah, and have like, 10 babies.”
(The wedding date is set for September. Awwww.)

THE END

THE END


Well folks, that's it. At least until the next trip.